Running with Bubbles

Marathon training

Week twelve, day four

Last week I was cleaning out my desk at work and packing up my personal things to take to my new job. My “office” at the courthouse was a cubicle, so I only had one box of stuff to take and lots of trash. I figured the new writ attorney wouldn’t need some green tea of indeterminate age or twelve slightly crumpled Eatzi’s napkins. I reached to the back of one drawer and my fingers closed around what I thought was a packet of hot chocolate mix.

I pulled out the packet and saw it was covered with Japanese writing, and tears immediately sprang to my eyes. It seemed like only a few months ago, but it must have been a few years ago, before Angi got sick. Tony and I went over to have homemade sushi at her and Joel’s house and we started with miso soup. We got to talking about it and Angi told me she had instant miso soup that she often made at work when she was a little hungry in the afternoons. I thought that sounded like a good idea, and she insisted on giving me a packet. I promised I would let her know how I liked it. Obviously, I threw it in my drawer and forgot about it.

It made me wonder what else I forgot. Did I tell her how much I envied her positive outlook on life? Did I tell her that her courage inspired me every day? I know I told her I loved her, but did I tell her often enough?

I wish I could tell her these things now. I wish I could tell her that she has inspired me to do things that scare me. I wish I could tell her that even though her smile no longer lights up the room, it still lights up my mind. I wish I could tell her that at mile fourteen today, I was tired and wanted to stop, but I thought of her and ran those last two miles.

I must have held that stupid soup packet in my hand for a full minute, trying to convince myself to throw it in the trash. It’s not Angi and it’s not even my memories of her. But still, I wasn’t quite ready to let it go. I tucked it in my box between my tattered Bluebook and a picture from our trip to Rome. I’ll let it go someday. Just not today.

I miss you, Bubbles. I still miss you so damn much.

Marathon training

Week twelve, day two

My new job is going great and I’m sorry I haven’t had time to respond to everyone who has emailed or messaged me to ask about it! I’ve been super busy at the firm getting ready for a big hearing tomorrow. Luckily, I still made it out to the trail yesterday afternoon. I did about 4.5 miles by myself, then met up with the team and went back out for the last 1.5.

Unfortunately, the one area that isn’t going as well as my training is my fundraising. I’m right at about 120 donors and not quite $3000. I have less than two months left and I have to get to $3500 just to stay on the team, so I’m once again asking my Facebook friends to please help if you can! Even $5 or $10 is great because the money really does add up quickly. I know I have set my goals high, but I’m still determined to try to meet them and do every little thing I can to prevent blood cancer from taking the life or health of someone else!

Marathon training

Week eleven, day four

Yesterday was one of my favorite days in the training season – mock race day! We have a finish line, cookie medals, and the world’s best pulled pork barbecue with all the fixin’s afterward. But the best part about it for me is that Tony comes out to cheer my teammates and me on! Last year, he rode his bike around the lake and stopped a few times to wait for us to come by and yell for us. His bike was stolen a few months ago, so this year he came out and ran to meet us and then ran back in with us. We ran 13 miles, he ran about four. And thanks to him, I had to run up the last little incline that I usually walk – I decided if he had the energy to run up the hill so did I! So today’s post is a special shout out to my wonderful husband, who not only puts up with all of my running and early to bed Fridays, but got up early on a Saturday morning to drive out to White Rock, cheer on the team, and run me in to the finish!

Marathon training

Week eleven, day two

I really wasn’t feeling it last night, but I dragged myself out to the Tuesday night group run with six miles to do. I slogged through them for a while, but by the time we hit mile four I had fallen a little bit behind and suddenly really, really had to pee. My running mates were too far ahead for me to yell to them, but no big deal – I run on the Katy trail by myself all the time. So I ducked into the ice house bathroom and then continued on my way. I hadn’t gone a quarter mile before my phone rang. It was Ryan. “Where are you?” I explained and told her I was fine and would see them at the end. But not more than a minute later, she and Shorty were running towards me.

They didn’t have to come back for me. I know I was slowing them down because my knees were bothering me last night. But boy, those last two miles were a lot more enjoyable with good company and conversation. You know, I think there might be something to this whole team thing.

Marathon training

Week eleven, day one

This one goes to eleven!

It was a good thing I checked my schedule Sunday night. When I look ahead on the schedule, I usually focus on the long runs so I didn’t even notice that Monday’s runs got longer too. So yesterday I had 3 miles and not the 2 I expected. I still ran at lunch, though, because yesterday was my last opportunity to do so.

Friday will be my last day at the court of appeals. I can’t believe I’ve been there almost five years. It’s been a fantastic place to work and I will really miss it, but it’s time to move on. As of next Monday, I’ll be senior counsel to a private firm practicing commercial litigation. Their offices are up by the Galleria, which is why I have to move my lunchtime workouts to before work.

I’m excited, but nervous too. I hope private practice is like riding a bike! Then again, if I can run a marathon, I’m pretty sure I can try a case. Wish me luck!

Marathon training

Week ten, day four

One of the things about training for an endurance event is that “long distance” becomes relative, a fact I sometimes forget. I was reminded of it Friday night when I told Tony that I only had to run nine miles on Saturday. He raised his eyebrows and replied, “Do you hear what you just said?” Yeah, I know. It was also my last single-digit Saturday run until the week before the marathon. Eek!

It was great running weather yesterday. Cool enough that I actually ran in capris and a long-sleeved shirt. Some of my teammates added hats and gloves – I tend to warm up faster than a lot of people so I don’t dress as heavily.   It’s one of two advantages I’ve found from being an, erm, larger than average runner; I don’t have to mess with hats and gloves and lots of layers. (The second advantage is that I get a lot of my running gear on the clearance rack; apparently not that many women are buying XL running clothes.)

I ran with Chrissy and Karen yesterday; the rest of our usual group is running the Dallas marathon and had sixteen miles on their schedule! Everything just went well for me yesterday and I finished feeling strong (assisted by a little post-run work on my foot by Dr. Chris). Got home, watched the Aggies lose 😦 and then went out to a raucous Halloween party with some great friends. Today is more football, resting and Chinese takeout for dinner. What a great weekend it’s been!

Marathon training

Week ten, day three

Two miles on a beautiful fall day today. I took my favorite route through Highland Park. I just love it – the people in cars not only stop for me to cross the street, but they wave at me as I go by (yes, with all of their fingers!) Right now I get to enjoy the festive-yet-tasteful Halloween decorations, which is just a tease for the Christmas lights to come. I even run past a treehouse that I’m pretty sure is nicer than my first apartment in New Haven.

You know, one reason I went to Yale was that I was sure I never wanted to live in Dallas again. And when I came back after my clerkship, it was only a couple years before I took off again, this time for New York. But as it turns out, I love Dallas. I love the Katy Trail, Northpark, the Cowboys and our skyline. I love the fact that we all pulled out our sweaters, wool pants and boots this week as it dipped below 60, and that women were out walking today in tights, jackets and ear warmers. I love that half of my friends have posted non-ironic pictures of Big Tex and corny dogs in the past month, and that the rest of us have non-ironically “liked” them.

I have kind of an itinerant soul, and I’m not sure Tony and I will live here forever. (I’m still pushing to live in Europe for a year before we hit 50). But whatever happens, I suspect that when I think of home, I’ll always think of Dallas.

Marathon Training

Week ten, day two

Six miles on the schedule yesterday, but our group run was canceled due to weather. I intended to get in as many miles as I could in the neighborhood, but it started to pour just as I got ready to head out. So, back to the gym track. Sigh. Six miles is 96 laps! I didn’t have the mental stamina for that, so I did three. But then….I woke up early this morning, headed back to the gym and got in the other three. Go me!

Yeah, it was hard to get up and run some more at 5:45 this morning. But you know what’s harder? Chemo.

Marathon Training

Week ten, day one

Two miles yesterday – on the track at the gym thanks to the much needed rain. I was typing the heading for this and thought, “can we really be on week ten already?” Something about double digits makes it seem like a long time. My training regimen is 22 weeks long, which is a long time in and of itself. So I guess I’m almost halfway there! Yesterday I filled out all the paperwork for the trip, and now it’s time to start searching for plane tickets at a reasonable price. I’m definitely starting to get excited!

Marathon training

Week nine, day four

So, something strange happened yesterday. And I don’t mean Texas beating OU. I had fourteen miles to run in the continuing heat and humidity, farther than I’ve ever run before. And…it was no big deal.

I’ve had a lot going on lately, so I didn’t really have time to get nervous about running farther than I’ve ever run before. Plus, a half-marathon is 13.1 miles, and due to the fact that I can’t break the habit of weaving through people like I’m driving on the Long Island Expressway, my distances at the end of my two halves have been 13.7 and 13.5. So I had in my head that it wasn’t really any farther once you round off those races.

Yesterday was the first time this season that I’ve been running just as the sun just started to rise. The sunrise always makes me think of Angi and how proud she’d be of my progress. Also, the little group I run with has really started to become great friends and I enjoy spending time with them (you learn a lot about each other slogging through a three hour run). Yeah, I was tired and sweaty but I actually really enjoyed myself.

I didn’t appreciate the mental part of distance running when I started. Your thoughts can lead you to some great (and terrible) places when you’re out there for a long time. It doesn’t always feel like something I can consciously control, but at the same time, I think training strengthens your mind just like it does your heart, lungs and legs. I wish I could say I won’t freak out any more this season, but I doubt that’s true. Still, like Mack Brown, I’ll take the wins when they come and look forward to the next challenge.